Tea Leaves

7:43 on a Wednesday eve & the Santa Ana's chill is biting so hard I've gone shaky at my skinned knees. So I hobble home to my bed instead of meandering through last nights skewed time line in my head so's not escalate the ache in my tightened chest, the throbbing in my swollen ankle, my grated palm, my jarred chin; oh where would I begin to recount & attest? No. For now, rest. Sip some chamomile & breathe in the steam, let it mellow my thoughts & steep them for my dreams when subconscious is unhinged. Tonight, let me forget feeling frayed fingering fickle fuzzies found 'round the fringes of my mind, like pinching at some kind of puff from a dandelion mane. The picking, the pulling, the grabbing & nabbing; the repetition is enough to steer me insane.


c.marie

I Hear a Hoo

It's most likely evident
that I have trouble sleeping
& not that it's relevant
but I've held a secret merit in keeping
a journal;
a mirror of the internal
declaration of independence
out of the quiet
via emotional transcendence
despite a mental corset.
It's not really that hard to see,
I'm losing my mind to Me.


c.marie

By Your Spine

Well... You looked at me
suggestively
when you were reciting your favorite lines
from that book you let me borrow
about
embracing the joys & sorrow
of getting to know your own mind...

Well... I wanted so desperately
to be
pressed upon those pages
then perhaps you would have been able
to read me, too
& you would have known that I was
this close
to kissing you to the ground
& that I longed to be bound by your spine...

But... Then the stupid doorbell rang
like some
clincher-cliche from a bad movie
only, more risque
but all you could say was
"Well, that's convenient."
& you pretended not to mean it
speaking with a smile that couldn't
beguile the truth that
you were shy & that's okay,
'cause so was I...

Well... In that forever-second you looked
into me,
deep
past yours or my uncertainty
in a brief moment of honesty
& I think we both forgot to breathe
a little
still high on two bottles of wine...

Well... Until the doorbell rang again
& it was then when you smirked with
smug lips as you rose to your feet
& I was dry for quick quips
before you even popped up from the floor
by your slender hips
to walk to the door with ease & charm
leaving me lying enchanted & disarmed
& you unlocked the bolted barrier
looking over your shoulder
at me, grounded behind...


c.marie

Glow

She's been visiting me in my dreams
from which i wish not to wake.

She's a figure for which i would learn
to use an abacus to figure out.

She's the smoke
of which i'd breathe a forever drag.

She's the trickling sand in the hourglass
& i'm upside down cupping the flow.

She is the firefly
& i am the glow.


c.marie

Remind Me...

It is painstakingly evident when I miss you. It is painstaking, when you are not around me; when we are not laughing ridiculously, making stupid things funny, appreciating the same beautiful thing in different ways, sharing our ideas & beliefs & wonders & endless questions & curiosities...

There are moments; when I laugh or tilt my head to my shoulder in order to see something more closely, in an attempt for some perspective, those moments when reality & imagination merge to create an incredible vision only you would understand or perhaps think of yourself... those moments are beautiful & cursed, for I look over in your direction with a dolphin smile to share... but you're not really there. All there is, is empty air to fill my limp lungs to fuel my stuttered heart, when you're not here.

But you feel it. Me. My thoughts of you... & immediately I am reminded that our minds are so synchronized, so parallel, when I see your name on my 2 inch screen after a message-ring from my pocket; I can't help but look over, & smile at the empty air where I know you know I am looking for you.

You remind me, that we were made for greatness together.

Mantra

Board to the beach...

Gotta sit & rethink, on the edge of my seat, on my own personal retreat. Gotta try to defeat these, inconsistencies takin' rise to optimize, obstacles as far as my eyes can see.

So, in the sand I sit, & I breathe, & I look & try to see, & I remember... Me.


c.marie

Face the Music

The face of the clock,
how he keeps a watch
on everything we do...

But a clock chimes death,
when time to face the music
at the cuckoo bird's cuckoo.


c.marie